


The Shape of Atonement

by rokalatte



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Gen, Isa doesn't help, Mostly Fluff, Roxas has trouble forgiving Isa, post kh3, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-07 11:10:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17959367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rokalatte/pseuds/rokalatte
Summary: After the final battle, Roxas has a hard time adjusting to having Isa around. Until he learns the truth about his return that is.(Or, Isa threatened Even to keep his mouth shut about Isa's involvement in Roxas's return but Roxas somehow gets it out of him.)(Light KH3 ending spoilers)





	The Shape of Atonement

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic for KH and fic in general in a looooong time. I have way too many thoughts and feelings about KH3 and Isa and the Seasalt Family in general. I'm on the verge of exploding. 
> 
> The timeline is slightly different from the ending scene in KH3 ;; 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! (Not edited so please forgive the probably numerous typos and mistakes and awkwardness at some parts > <)

The war was over. The battles of light and dark a thing of the past. Their celebrations afterwards memories to be cherished in this lifetime and the next. And while a melancholic sadness lingered in everyone’s hearts for the one that, despite all he had done for every one of them, didn’t make it back, life moved on. It had to. Because that’s what _he_ would’ve wanted. 

Despite the grudges held from previous lives, everyone had move on from the past. Well, agreed as best they could that no one would blame anyone for the actions of their past selves. But as it turned out, not blaming and forgiving were two very different things.

 

 

Xion was back. Axel was there too. And Hayner and Pence and Olette too. But added to their little group was someone Roxas hadn’t yet forgiven but would tolerate for the others’ sake.

Saix. Or, Isa as he preferred to be addressed nowadays.

Axel welcomed him back with open arms and teary eyes. Even Xion shuffled towards him and gave him a quick but tight hug upon his return. And Roxas? Roxas lingered a ways back and stared.

Axel’s forgiveness was to be expected. While they obviously had a lot to figure out considering how the last decade of their existence had passed them by and driven them apart, Isa was Axel’s oldest friend.

Xion’s relief and joy over Sa- Isa’s return was much more of a surprise considering she had it much worse than he did back in the day. But from what Xion told him afterwards when he was sulking on the clocktower one afternoon, Isa had apologized, trained, and protected her when the Organization brought her back. She had been re-created to act as one of Xehanort’s vessels and yet, somehow, she never bore the golden eyes the rest of the organization were bestowed with. Her eyes remained a brilliant blue right until their reunion. Apparently, Saix had a hand in keeping her out of Xehanort’s clutches and in their time together at the true Organization, had worked it out and even bonded. She considers him a friend now. A precious one.

But Roxas wasn’t that quick to forgive. He didn’t complain or object to Isa hanging out with them but he also couldn’t help but give him the cold shoulder. It wasn’t like Roxas didn’t try to forgive him. He tried. He tried to see how Isa was different from Saix, to move on from the past and embrace this second chance at life he, they, had all been granted. He tried but he couldn’t and in all honesty, Isa wasn’t making it easy.

Beating the crap out of Saix in that final battle helped and Isa apologized too of course, the second he got the chance. But that was about it. Attempts at reconciliation with Isa were stagnant at best and the two hardly directly interacted with each other. Isa bought them all ice-cream a lot, but as much as Roxas liked seasalt ice-cream, Isa bribing him with it seemingly as a means of atonement left a bitter taste in his mouth.

In the end, they had settled on a silent agreement to simply leave it be.

 

 

Each visit to Radiant Garden drew nostalgic observations out of Axel and Isa about how close it was to returning to its former glory. They chatted leisurely about the familiarity of the scenery and quips of the mischief they got into back in the day. Xion would giggle lightly upon hearing their childhood mis-adventures and how different they had been before well, before everything changed. Roxas pretended not to be interested but truthfully, he found it fascinating as well. But there was no way he was going to let Isa know that. 

The nostalgic chatter faded as the four of them strolled through the castle doors.

“Hey, guys! We’re here for our regular check-up.”

Every two weeks, sometimes more, they had the scientists do a routine check-up on them. Xion and Roxas to monitor the stability of their vessels because as much confidence Even had in his work, they still couldn’t be absolutely sure nothing would glitch. Isa and Axel, mostly Isa because Axel always found a way to worm his way out of the checkup, had their recompletion as humans checked on. Isa had gone through it twice but they had, they all had, spent over a decade as Nobodies. The return to humanity and hearts was surely a thorny road to walk.

“Nothing appears to be out of the ordinary.” Even remarked while Ienzo smiled and handed him a piece of candy. It was a little embarrassing, being treated like a child but the candy was good and Ienzo seemed so genuinely excited to see them every time they came that he couldn’t help but smile in return.

“Thanks again Zex- I mean, Ienzo.”

“You’re welcome, Roxas. It’s always a pleasure seeing you. And Xion as well.”

“Hey! What about me and Isa here? Aren’t we a pleasure to see as well?” Axel reappeared out of the void he vanished into as soon as the checkups were finished.

“Why yes, Lea, it is most certainly a _pleasure_ to see you.” Even replied, “it’d be an even greater pleasure if you would actually let us do our part and make sure you are well.”

“Aw, come on Even, Isa had it way worse than any of us. If he’s fine, we’re definitely fine.” Axel gets a sharp look from Isa in response. “Stop being so fussy.”

Everyone laughs as Even begins his animated speech about being thorough and careful and many other such things.

“Cut him some slack, Axel. After all, he’s the reason Xion and I are here. It’s thanks to him that we can laugh like this again.”

Even stops abruptly mid-speech and looks, frozen, at Roxas. The air in the room shifts and to Roxas’s surprise, Even simply shrugs and looks away, looking nervously around the room while scratching his head. “Oh, yeah… Right. I was simply doing what was obvious. It wasn’t strictly speaking, _for you_ , I was simply -“

“Atoning.” Isa finishes his sentence and Even immediately shuts up. Isa doesn’t even flinch at the cold look Roxas gives him.

“At least he’s working on it.” He says coldly.

The air turns frigid and a silence envelopes the group.

Axel’s the one that breaks the silence. “So uh, are we done here? It’s about time to meet Hayner and them for ice-cream.”

“Yeah we’re done.” Roxas says, already making his way to the exit. Xion and Axel exchange worried looks as the trail after him. He doesn’t notice the look of guilt Even gives Isa as he follows behind them.

 

 

It’s almost two months later when he finally learns the truth. Roxas had an unexpected blip during a usual check-up and was requested to stay an extra day for observation, just in case. He wakes early the next day, earlier than Ienzo and Even had expected apparently, and overhears them talking in the lab.

“Isn’t it time you told him the truth? He can’t keep it from him forever.”

“He intends to, Ienzo. He swore me to secrecy. Threatened might be the more appropriate term. Just yesterday he gave me that look of his to make sure I kept my mouth shut about the truth of Roxas’s return.”

“What truth?” Roxas can’t help but interrupt. “Who?”

Ienzo and Even flinch at his appearance and exchange hesitant looks at each other. They look reluctant to tell him, but Roxas doesn’t waver in his resolve and they eventually cave. Even looking remorseful as he turns to face him.

“Well Roxas, actually…”

 

 

“Were you ever going to tell me?!” Roxas storms over to where Isa and Axel are currently engaged in a childish argument with Xion clearly egging them on. All three of them freeze upon his exclamation.

“H-hey Roxas, how was-” Axel starts but is promptly cut off by Isa stepping over his foot. Roxas ignores all of that to stand angrily in front of Isa, grabbing him by the collar and trembling where he stands.

Isa doesn’t react. “What do you mean?”

“Roxas, please don’t fight.” Xion tugs lightly on Roxas’s arm, trying to calm him down. They know he never warmed up to Isa they way the rest of them had but he never resorted to… _this_.

Roxas looks down, his entire body trembling before letting go of Isa’s shirt. “Were you ever going to tell me? That you… it’s because of you… _only_ because of you that…” Roxas’s voice cracks and trails off.

Finally, both Xion and Axel realise what this is about and fall silent.

A raging torrent of emotions storm in Roxas’s heart as he comes to terms with everything. Anger. At himself, for being so blind. Regret. In retrospect, of just how ignorant and unfair he had been this whole time. A whole plethora of conflicting feelings threaten to tear his heart apart when he hears a sigh above him.

“Even isn’t going to be able to sleep soundly for the next month.”

Roxas looks up, tears dotting his lashes, surprise evident on his face. Almost instantly, the storm in his chest is stilled. Isa looks at him with the same calm expression as he says his next words.

“His precious research is about to experience several unfortunate… delays.”

It takes Roxas a moment to process what he’s just heard but after a moment he lets out a laugh he hadn’t realized he’d been holding in all this time. “What are you going to do? Steal his data?” Roxas gives a tired laugh.

Isa quirks an eyebrow at him. “Steal his data? That’s the least of his worries. Is that what he thinks is coming?” Isa smirks, “he’s clearly forgotten who he’s dealing with and Lea’s influence on me.”

“Hey! Slander! Don’t listen to him Roxas, I’m innocent! Isa was responsible for coming up with most, if not all, of the craziest pranks we did as kids. Heck, he turned me pink once! Pink! For a week! Just because I finished his cereal without telling him!”

The mental image is too much to bear and Roxas can’t help the endless stream of laugher that comes out. It makes it all the better when Isa says, “I have pictures,” and suddenly Axel and Isa are wrestling on the ground what with Axel trying to stop him from retrieving and revealing said pictures.

Roxas and Xion laugh, from the bottom of his heart he laughs and him and Xion help Isa with restraining Axel. “I wanna see!” Xion exclaims as she clings onto Axel’s waist to pull him off Isa.

He’d gotten it wrong. All this time he’d resented Isa, past grudges holding him a prisoner from opening his heart to the man. All this time he thought Isa was shirking on trying to gain his forgiveness. For trying to atone. But in reality, he had simply been blinded by his resentment to see that Isa had been atoning all this time. The things he told himself he didn’t notice, the kindness, the gentleness, the sometimes overbearing protectiveness over himself and Xion. Isa has been atoning the whole time, even long before Roxas chose to ignore it. He put his own heart on the line to atone and bring them, bring him, back.

Xion managed to almost pull Axel off Isa and Roxas helped pry Axel’s hands off Isa’s arms. Axel screamed traitor from Xion’s arms and struggled uselessly. Just as he managed to free Isa completely from Axel’s grasps, he lingers by Isa’s side, hand on his arm.

Roxas looks into Isa’s eyes, the pure, ever stoic yet endlessly fond blues and smiles. “Thank you, Isa.”

Xion and Axel still where they are, Xion sprawled over Axel’s back to keep him down, watching expectantly. Isa smiles softly and gives Roxas a light ruffle through his hair.

Roxas beams, the mist that had been hovering around his heart finally dissipating once and for all.

“So, pink Axel huh?”

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't get the idea of Isa hiding his involvement in Roxas's return out of my head. I kind of imagine that he doesn't tell Roxas even though he knows Roxas will forgive him if he knew because he doesn't think it's enough. I don't actually think Roxas would hold that much of a grudge and he's by no means the odd one out of the group even though the fic gives that impression. I just wanted to focus more on Roxas's turmoil and his thoughts about Isa.
> 
> (honestly, I could go on and on about isa and kh3 and well, kh in general so i'm just going to stop here before an essay ends up appearing here)
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
